Love & Hate
The reason why the romantic special love relationship is such an intense and universally sought-after experience is that it seems to offer liberation from a deep-seated state of fear, need, lack and incompleteness that is part of the human ego condition in its unredeemed and unenlightened state. There is a physical as well as a psychological dimension to this state |
| Love & hate Relationships |
Physical
On the physical level, you are obviously not whole, nor will you ever be: You are either a man or a woman, which is to say, one-half of the whole. On this level, the longing for wholeness, the return to oneness, manifests as male-female attraction, man's need for a woman, woman's need for a man. It is an almost irresistible urge for union with the opposite energy polarity. The root of this physical urge is a spiritual one: the longing for an end to duality, a return to the state of wholeness.
Sexual union is the closest you can get to this state on the physical level. This is why it is the most deeply satisfying experience that the physical realm can offer. But sexual union is no more than a fleeting glimpse of wholeness, an instant of bliss.
Psychological
On the psychological level, the sense of lack and incompleteness is, if anything, even greater than on the physical level. As long as you are identified with the ego mind, you have an externally derived sense of self. That is to say, you get your sense of who you are from things that ultimately have nothing to do with who you are:
- your social role
- possessions
- external appearance
- successes
- failures
This false, mind-made self, the ego, feels vulnerable, insecure, and is always seeking new things to identify with to give it a feeling that it exists. But nothing is ever enough to give it lasting fulfillment. Its fear remains; its sense of lack and neediness remains.
A love hate relations
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